суббота, 18 октября 2008 г.

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WOW. Am I really writing an entry in my live journal?�After all this time?�

YES - I AM

And, I am finding that it is very.. Cathartic. It is a weird feeling though. I am not sure anyone really reads livejournal anymore�(except Sawyer - youapos;ve stayed true to the cause) so itapos;s almost weird writing knowing that it will probably be months, maybe even years before someone reads this. Similar to what happened to me tonight. I�was thinking about starting a blog on blogspot and began thinking about my livejournal. I was sure it had deleted because I�havenapos;t logged on in well over a year, but to my surprise, everything was still here. Okay, so alot of pictures have been deleted, but itapos;s like my emotional state was frozen in time through every entry. Itapos;s very..nostalgic.

I just feel like looking back at my journal tonight and remembering who I�was..and thinking about how it has shaped who I�am. Itapos;s nice to remember a time in your life when you thought about life instead of getting caught in it. Itapos;s nice to look back and try to remember what it was like to yearn for some perspective.

Itapos;s a Saturday night and Iapos;m thinking about my friends. Today is Marthaapos;s 24th birthday.�Tomorrow is Clarieapos;s 24th birthday.�24 sounds old to me even though itapos;s not. Today I was thinking that 17 doesnapos;t sound that young, until�I realized I am 6 years older than a 17 year old. And that made me feel old. Am I where I�wanted to be in life?�Not really.�Does/should what I�wanted matter?�Not sure?

Maybe Iapos;m not exactly where I�wanted to be, but am I WHO�I wanted to be?�Thatapos;s�a good question. Maybe I�just need a�little perspective.

If you do still frequent the olapos; LJ, please comment and let me know your alive. I miss everyone truly madly deeply.

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